Graduate school sucks

Don't read this if you don't want to hear negativitiy and complaints.

I am tired. I have been in school a long, long time. I am 36 years old and I have one more semester to go - after this one - and then I have to take comps. I am so intimidated by comps. I have no idea if I can possibly remember everything I need to know to get through them. Three questions? That's insane.

Also, I have a life. I have a home with an overgrown flower bed, a lawn that needs to be weeded and about a 100 other things I do not have time for. Inside that house is about three works worth of laundry and carpets that need to be replaced but I don't have time.

TIME TIME TIME. full time classes. full time job. full time marriage. full time everything. there isn't any blankety blank time for anything.

I am constantly persistently annoyingly on the go, go, go, go.

Tuesday morning I went to sheperherdsville with a friend of mine and we stopped and looked at this darling yellow house with two back decks, a nice fire place, a large back yard with a concrete koi pond and a large gardener' shed. It had a two car carport on the side with a large rounded concrete pad where I could picture fall parties taking place.

I grew up in a small town, mostly. My family are country people. I wanted to call that lady up on the FOR SALE sign and move in this week. I want to be a librarian in a small library and have weekly poetry readings and children's book clubs. I want to order books for browsing collections and arrange comfy chairs around them to lure people in to plop down and read them. I want to have morning coffee's on Tuesday for the Ladies Auxillary.

I want to have time to plant my front garden beds and lay in a million tulip bulbs for the spring and take my dog for a long walk without feeling guilty because all my homework isn't done.

And, right now, I want a big bowl of chocolate icecream.

katrina